Antiques Freaks

The Dust Cloud by E.F. Benson (1906) with Terrible Book Club

Do you like antique and vintage cars? We can almost guarantee your affection for the automobile does not surpass—nay, does not nearly equal—the lust held by the notorious Edwardian author E.F. Benson. Thrill at this tale of haunted honking! Marvel at the myriad motors! Shrink with horror from a story somehow more sensual than anything tackled by Carnacki the Ghost-Finder! Featuring Chris and Paris of the Terrible Book Club podcast.

CONTENT WARNING for irreverent discussion of the passing of a fictional child and a fictional dog.

Corner Chairs

Do you know the old man in the corner? The Antiques Freaks go on a wild ride to track down an antiques furniture mystery.

Questions? Answers!

What are the worst antiques repair hacks? What Brimfield horror stories have we endured? And what's the next big antiques market trend? Answers to all these questions and more from your favorite Freaks! (Now hit 'em with the Brasso!)

Ch. 45 - Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood (1845)

Ken's microphone has perished after seven years of valiant service. In memoriam (and while we await shipment of a replacement) please enjoy this episode from our Varney vaults, wherein our dear friend O F Cieri returns for a chilling chapter of cracking coffins.

Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience.

To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

The Edward Gorey House

Meet the mind behind the PBS Mystery—Coco Raymond and Freya Weil of the Edward Gorey House in Yarmouth, Massachusetts join the Antiques Freaks to tell all about the delightfully strange and weirdly cozy world of the (in)famous American collector, author, illustrator, playwright, set and costume designer.

The Marital Rating Scale (1930s)

Have you ever wondered what it might be like to wed an Antiques Freak? Wonder no more, as Ken and Dee take the Marital Rating Scale test developed in the 1930s by George W. Crane (Ph.D., M.D.), cofounder of the Scientific Marriage Foundation. Shout out to QuestionableAdvice on tumblr for this incredible, baffling, and incredibly baffling quiz.

Blue Mountain Pottery

This time for real and true! From ski lodge to angel fish, they’ve got it all—yes, it’s Blue Mountain Pottery, the mid-century modern ceramics sensation.

Ch. 44 - Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood (1845)

Waggles has arrived!

Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience.

To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

Ch. 41, 42, and 43 - Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood (1845)

The interesting thing about the forty-first, forty-second, and forty-third chapters of Varney the Vampire is that they don't exist.

Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience.

To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

The Zube Tube

It’s the hottest toy of the 1989 Christmas season and a retro sensation that’s sweeping the nation—the Ultimate Cosmic Sound Machine TM has landed on the podcast, leaving the Antiques Freaks frightened and confused. Where did it come from? What does it want? How did you find this? Who sent you?

T - The Sailor’s Word Book (1867) with Hannah

Tap the admiral. Timber-taster. Tom Astoners. Tumble up. All these nautical terms and more defined in this, the twentieth chapter of The Sailor’s Word-Book.

Ch. 40 - Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood (1845)

Our friend James Wake joins us for an action-packed episode of mob violence against a vampyre!

Check out James's cyberpunk novel THE SAPPHIRE SHADOW, available now wherever fine books are found.

Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience.

To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

The New York Antiquarian Book Fair

The Antiques Freaks have ventured out into the wider world and returned with tales of wonder, including the most ironic possible book for sale, the most charming bookseller disclaimer, the smuggest item listing we’ve ever seen, and why you should always write your shop name on your price tag.

Revenge of the Horse of the Invisible - Carnacki the Ghost-Finder with Terrible Book Club

Once upon a time in April of 2020 we read our first Carnacki story - but we did not read it on air. Now the Horse of the Invisible has returned to wreak its revenge, and only Chris and Paris of the Terrible Book Club podcast can rescue the Antiques Freaks from its horrible haunting.

Library Book Sale Haul

Why do most antiquarian and rare booksellers avoid library book sales? And why do we think you should buck the trend and attend anyway? Also, what are the startling similarities between books and human flesh, and how does a hairdryer form the vital link? Tune in for our library book sale haul and find out!

Ch. 39 - Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood (1845)

Our friend Tarra joins us for another thrilling chapter - wherein the duel FINALLY ACTUALLY HAPPENS!

Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience.

To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

Questionable Advice and Vintage Etiquette

The mind behind the tumblr Questionable Advice joins the Antiques Freaks for a rousing discussion on the social history hidden in books and ephemera, and what hilarious and poignant gems we can uncover for our modern age—such as, maybe eating a live spider will cure your flu? (Can’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it!) To read more questionable advice, check out the blog at: questionableadvice.tumblr.com

Ch. 38 - Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood (1845)

Wherein Jack Pringle and Chillingworth meet up with Varney to prepare for the OH GOD WHY IS MARCHDALE HERE!?

Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience.

To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

Little Golden Books

Nothing gold can stay… except, of course, for Little Golden Books. Tune in to learn their origin story as literature for the youthful masses and where the deuce they hide that pesky edition number for The Pokey Little Puppy.

Ch. 37 - Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood (1845)

Our dear friend Olivia rejoins us for another thrilling chapter of Varney the Vampire! Wherein Varney attempts to seduce literally any man who shows up on his doorstep.

Check out Olivia's spooky novels Lord of Thundertown and Backmask.

Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience.

To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.